Interest does not justify inquiry.
E and I decided that one needed to be written down. It must be all those manners books I've been reading lately. The context of this is that a friend of mine recently adopted and when I saw him today, I learned that he did not adopt a baby as I had imagined, but instead adopted 2 school aged girls from foster care. I was so moved when he explained his 'instant family,' that tears came to my eyes. I had lots of questions, as did E, but I used the above to explain why I didn't ask more of them. We aren't close confidantes, bosom buddies or family, so things that I wonder will either come out through interaction and my friend's sharing or it's okay that I don't know everything. For example, one question that never entered my mind to ask is why they are adopting - I think most people would agree that asking for personal medical information is probably rude. But asking if the girls are natural sisters or the same race as my friend and his wife fall into a bit more of a gray area. I decided to rise above my curiosity, congratulate my friend and acknowledge that the answers, while interesting, aren't really as important as what was shared, that a new family has been established.